Back when I started Just Be Real, I wrote this post:
It’s now a top post on this blog.
And I’ve had people tweet me on Twitter, who were pissed off by what I shared.
They made that clear by voicing their disagreements.
Then In 2015-2016, I wrote an answer to a question on Q&A Site – Quora. The question was about whether glasses ruin your eyes or not.
I shared my personal experiences, which I believe, glasses DO ruin your eye sight.
Then all of a sudden, pissed off trolls came crawling out from their caves and laid the smack down on me.
I infuriated them so much you’d think I cheated on their wives or pissed in their morning coffee.
Does that make me a bad person for being myself and sharing my opinions?
A lot of people would hesitate in situations like that.
After all, you don’t want to hurt anybody’s feelings. But then that comes at the price of NOT being yourself.
There’s a massive difference between being yourself and being an asshole.
So on that note, here’s Why You Should Always Be Yourself, Even If It Pisses People Off.
1. You’re not everybody’s cup of tea
Not everyone likes tea and biscuits. So what are you gonna do – force everyone to LIKE tea and biscuits just because you don’t?
At the expense of their own happiness?
Think about that!
The same is true for you.
You’re just not everybody’s cup of tea because not everyone likes it sweet, bitter, strong, or whatever.
Everybody’s tastes and preferences are different.
Some people think I’m too much, too childish, too ambitious, too silly, too laid back… And the list goes on.
That pisses them off, and yet there’s nothing I can do about it.
You could be the nicest guy in the world. Or the most beautiful woman ever seen. But someone, somewhere, will dislike you.
And that’s true whether you be yourself or you don’t.
Someone will always find something they don’t like about you, and there’s nothing you can do to change it.
And for one reason or another, you’re bound to piss people off regardless of how you are or how you act.
2. You weren’t born to please everybody
When you were born, the last thing your tiny brain was thinking about is – “I have to please everybody”.
As a baby it’s the other way around: You demand other people’s attention and expect them to please you.
If you’re alive and kicking, you were born to do something, live life, and make it happen.
You were born to fulfill your desires, happiness, or whatever else that’s important to you.
I be myself everyday without even thinking about it.
And when someone doesn’t like my opinions, behavior, or how I look, I’m not even sorry about it.
Why should I be?
This is who I am. I can’t change who I am no matter how hard I try to pretend to be something I’m not.
And you can’t change your personality no matter how many times you watch a motivational speech.
It’s called personality for a reason. It’s unique to each person.
And trying to please everybody by being something you’re not is to your own detriment.
Some people are pissed off by your very existence, and no amount of pleasing will change their disgust in you.
3. Your happiness should come first
From the moment you’re born you’re stuck in your own body. With your own life.
So whatever you do in your life will affect how you live it, and how happy you are living it.
I tried putting other people’s happiness before mine. That choice ended in failure.
I went to college and pursued the 9-5 life. The average life everyone is encouraged to pursue.
I did only what society expected of me, and nothing more.
The old me pursued a life that wasn’t true to who I am.
My happiness came 2nd, 3rd, 4th, 5th, last. Instead it should have come first.
And that’s the point: Unless you put your own happiness first, happiness will avoid you like you’re a disease.
I’d rather piss people off and be myself if it means I get to be happy.
Doing the opposite is a one-way road trip to a desert full of regrets and misery.
4. Kissing ass won’t solve the problem
I’ve seen people do it with me, as well as others. And it only ends up in disaster.
The thing is: If you have to kiss ass, then your self esteem will end up with more than a black eye eventually.
That black eye then becomes a broken nose, jaw, bones, and even worse.
When your self esteem reaches that point, it’s hard to recover from it.
That’s what happens when you loan out your self esteem in order to please others and degrade yourself.
Trust me, it’s better to piss someone off and be yourself than it is to walk down the dark alley of poor self esteem.
That shit is depressing, and may even lead to suicide. Which is sad to even think about.
5. We’re all flawed one way or another
We’re like glass. On the outside we may appear flawless, but there are a few cracks on the edges that are hidden from sight.
Because of this:
- We can’t please everybody.
- We can’t do everything “right”.
- And we can’t make everybody happy.
So you’re no different to a man pursuing a woman who isn’t attracted to him: You’re just wasting your time and energy.
I’m flawed and that’s what makes me great.
I’m not everybody’s cup of tea, and that’s why I attract certain types of people. Or why I’m respected by a specific group of people.
If I wasn’t flawed, then I’d be a fraud. Because I’d try my best to make everyone like and accept me.
Even though doing so wouldn’t change the fact that some people just can’t or won’t like me.
So should you be yourself even if it pisses people off?
The answer is – damn straight!
Unless you’re crazy enough to try and please 7+ billion people on this planet, then just be yourself and get over it.
It may not be fair, but that’s what makes life more interesting if you ask me.