“Never say anything about yourself you do not want to come true.” – Brian Tracy
Self worth is like gladiator armor. It protects you from any outside forces or dangers.
And if any damage is inflicted on you, it doesn’t last long. You can easily bounce back from it. You’ll be able to deflect any damage thrown at you.
But what If you don’t know how to create that armor? What If you don’t know what materials to use to make your armor stronger?
Well, that’s what I’ll be getting into. Knowing how to create self worth will help you keep it, sustain it and strengthen it.
Pay attention to these 6 things that create self worth.
1. How you deal with being mistreated
“People will mistreat you, but never let them defeat you.” – Unknown
I was first bullied at the age of 6 years old. That’s a form of mistreatment. Back then my gladiator armor (self worth) wasn’t as strong as it is today.
No matter who you are or where you’re born, you’ll be mistreated throughout your life one way or another. Whether it’s physical bullying, or someone shouting and screaming in your face as if you’re a peasant.
Being mistreated isn’t the thing that matters. It’s how you respond to it.
When I was dealing with bullying, my self worth was about as tall as….. Whatever the thought was that just popped into your mind.
I didn’t know any better so I didn’t know how to deal with being mistreated in a way that would build my self worth. Or at least protect it from the naysayers.
How could I? I was 6 years old. I barely knew my right leg from my left leg.
That’s where the problems begin for most of us. If you don’t know how to respond to mistreatment, it will crush you.
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2. Your accomplishments
I used to play the Video Game – Ninja Gaiden 2. I ended up beating the game on the hardest difficulty. Something only a couple hundred people in the world had accomplished.
The video game has millions of players.
When I used to make music I had my song featured on the radio.
This blog has been featured in the top 100 personal development blogs in the world. Twice. I’ve reached millions of people in a year online, and so on.
These are examples of accomplishments for me. The type of accomplishment doesn’t matter, as long as you accomplish something.
The more you accomplish, the more self worth you’ll end up with. And the type of things you accomplish will impact your self worth in a big or a small way.
But it all adds up. So go out there and accomplish something. No matter how big or small it is.
3. The things you choose to believe in
When I was a kid I believed in being different. I believed doing the same thing as everybody else was not the way to go. But of course, I conformed in some ways.
One of those ways was being a product of my environment to a degree.
I also believed I was worthless and pathetic as a teenager. Naysayers and bullies taught me to believe that.
They sold me their bullshit and I eventually bought it. And so, my self worth suffered. Though it was deeper than that.
I did things I kinda regret now, all because I chose to believe in the criticism I was being sold.
But these days? I believe in… myself.
What you choose to believe in will determine your level of self worth. So be mindful of that.
The good thing is – you get to choose what you believe in. And you can change WHAT you believe in at any given moment.
Every time I’m with my niece and nephew, they demand my attention (when they were younger). Kids are full of energy after all.
But that’s not the reason why they demand my attention. No, it’s because like everybody, we want to be acknowledged by others.
Being acknowledged has the power to make or break a relationship or friendship. And beyond that, the most important thing it does is strengthen your self worth.
When I had my website featured in the top 100 list, I acknowledged it by celebrating. I went for a Chinese meal or something like that.
It’s not just acknowledgement from others that helps. It’s acknowledging your own self and the things you accomplish.
Self-acknowledgement is the most powerful type of acknowledgement. It’s the main way to build, strengthen and sustain your self worth.
Once you have that, you’ll feel a lot better about who you are on the inside. And no outside acknowledgements (or lack of) will be able to affect how you feel on a detrimental level.
5. How you see yourself
When I used to look in the mirror, I saw ugliness. That’s why I tore up some of the photographs of myself that I had.
Under all that ugliness is pain, sadness, criticism, naysayers, and insecurity. But it was dressed up in fancy clothing so nobody else was able to see it.
Now when I look in the mirror I see me for what I am. I see happiness, joy, excitement, passion, calm, and laughter.
Looking at myself in the mirror is enjoyable. I’m not perfect, but I know I’m more than enough. And so my self worth reflects that.
When you look into the mirror, what do you see?
Whatever it is you see, just know that’s the reason your self worth is either bright or dull. Because how you see yourself is what creates and defines your self worth.
If you don’t see yourself in the brightest of lights, then find a set of stronger bulbs. Turn up the brightness a little.
You do that by emptying all the negative feelings and thoughts into the garbage. And throwing it all out for good.
It takes practice, but you’ll get there.
Being recognized for your efforts is helpful. It’s not crucial for your self worth, but it does play a role.
When I receive comments on this website, I’m grateful. That adds to the satisfaction I get from putting out content without recognition.
The feeling may not last forever. In fact, it lasts for a couple of minutes. Maybe no longer than half an hour. But being recognized for my efforts does help.
It adds to my self worth.
Especially when the thing I’m being recognized for is priceless. Meaning – you can’t put a price tag on it. Because it’s invaluable, no different to things like love, a strong bond or affection.
Being recognized for the way you dress is cool. But it has nothing on being recognized for something purposeful with deep meaning.
What Creates Self Worth?
- How you deal with being mistreated
- Your accomplishments
- The things you choose to believe in
- How you see yourself
If you want to feel worthy, focus on these 6 things. Study them. Pay attention. It’s all a work in progress, and your efforts are never-ending.
If there’s an area you feel you’re weak in, then make an effort to improve on it. The goal isn’t to aim for perfection, it’s to progress and improve.
Do that, and your self-worth will thank you for it.