In the beginning of human history we were nothing but animals compared to how we live today.
You had to kill what you wanted to eat and eat what you killed. Usually in small groups of 4 or more.
Maybe even a small family of 3. A mother, father and a son or daughter (that’s how I picture it).
There was nobody to compare yourself too. And nobody to get jealous of. Because:
- We were spread out all across the earth.
- We had no direct contact with the outside world.
- We weren’t being spoon fed bullshit by the mainstream news or anyone with an agenda centered around their fragile ego.
- Materialism wasn’t widespread and cherished like it is in 2018.
- The media and Internet didn’t exist.
This type of simple lifestyle would have made you more grateful, happy, and at peace with yourself as a human being. Seeing as there was no “standard” or “ridiculous outside expectations” to live up to.
You know, like:
- You have to own a home by age X.
- You should have kids by age Y.
- You have to settle down and get married by age Z.
- You have to get a job you hate to pay A, and fit the beauty standards to be approved of B.
But that’s not the case anymore. Self esteem issues (and comparing yourself to others) is at an all time high for one simple reason…
Comparison is the devil. And that’s even more true in 2018
Why would someone go out of their way to pay attention to everything you’re doing instead of minding their own business? And even judging you in the process from a far when they don’t even know who you are?
Why have girls messaged me saying: “I just posted a picture on Facebook. Could you please give it a LIKE for me?”
Why would someone add you on Facebook when they don’t even talk to you (or even like you for that matter), only to never say a word?
And Why would someone attempt to put you down to lift themselves up, or treat you as if you’re less than they are?
The answer to those questions is the same reason:
- Why women wear so much makeup that they look like the talking orange on YouTube.
- Why people bully others for being different.
- Why Jewelry is so desirable.
- Why we try to keep up with the Joneses.
- Why we idolize celebrities and put them on a fucking pedestal.
- Or why we stroke our own ego in a pitiful attempt to feel better about ourselves.
There’s only ONE reason we do all these things:
To feel important. But in doing so, people compare themselves to their own detriment.
Comparison IS the devil In disguise.
The devil of comparison tricks you into believing:
- Happiness lives outside of yourself.
- Comparing yourself to someone with “less” will make you feel better over the long term.
- Comparing yourself to someone with “more” will make you feel worthy.
- Self esteem comes from materialistic possessions.
- Attaching your emotions to “things” will help you feel fulfilled and happy.
- Kicking others down to bring yourself up will magically solve your problems.
- Living your life according to other people’s expectations will guarantee you a happy lifestyle.
But guess what? ALL of these things are bred from comparison. And overdosing on comparison will give your self esteem a black eye and a broken nose. And even worse than that.
Comparison is not the right way to build your confidence. But it is the right way to piss all over your self esteem.
To the point where you’re constantly looking for something or someone to compare yourself to, and judge from a far as if you yourself are free from problems or flaws.
Or as if you’re any better than the person you’re judging without having any context whatsoever.
Comparison is a disease
― Clyde Lee Dennis
It’s the reason a young guy killed himself after being made redundant, and being forced to take government benefits.
Or why students end up depressed and suicidal when their grades are below average. Because the world brainwashes kids into believing only losers have bad grades.
Or why kids commit suicide in fear of the far-fetched expectations their parents have set for them.
When comparison is part of the equation, your self-esteem starts eating away at itself. And you die from the inside out along the way.
Focus on yourself and shut out everything on the outside.
Real confidence (and self-esteem) is internal. It comes from inside.
Fake (and life threatening) confidence comes from the outside. Disguised as materialism and outside opinions about how you should act.
Anything that leads you to compare yourself to fit a standard is a suicide mission. And I’d avoid it.
Standards is something you need to set for yourself. That’s the definition of true happiness.
That’s what I’ve learned anyway.